Oklahoma City Thunder: Readers respond to 'Our boys' - NewsOK.com (blog)

on July 2, 2012M at 3:30 pm

I received a lot of fun response from my column in the Saturday Oklahoman about the maternal instincts of some Thunder fans, and how basketball players connect with fans, particularly some women who might not be die-hard sports fans but become die-hard fans of Kevin and Russell and James and “our boys.” You can read the column here.
I thought I’d share some of the emails with you.

John: “Reminds me of my wife screaming at the ump when they called a balk on our son. I asked her what a balk is. She said she didn’t know except our son wouldn’t do it. Keep telling us what balks are.”

Now that was funny. And John is right. Most fans are emotionally involved with their team. But when they become emotionally and personally involved, sometimes rational thought takes a holiday.

From my old pal Ray Goldsby, a long-time high school football coach in Oklahoma: “Still laughing and amused at your article this morning. All of these years I always thought you had a ‘kush’ job! Now I know your life is no different than mine when I was coaching. Ha ha. It does not matter what you say or do, you can never please everyone. Again, your job is a lot like coaching because it is not our job to please everyone. You do what is right, be tactful and courteous, work hard, be honest, and do the best you can.”

Interesting. I never thought of the similarities between us writers and coaches. Truth is, coaches have it way worse than us. Editors generally have a lot more backbone than do school board members.

Leslie chimed and pled guilty to seeing sports differently: “Hey Berry! You hit the nail on the head in your ‘our boys’ column. I am a mother of five, whose first three were girls and never cared about sports until my sons came along. Now I’m playing catch-up trying to learn. Still don’t know much. But your column was so insightful because it got really heated around my house during the playoffs when daddy and the boys started criticizing various aspects of the Thunder players’ games. As a mother of two hard-working, aspiring athletes, I kept saying, ‘knock it off guys, that’s some mama’s baby you’re dissin’!’ To no avail. I could write a column from ‘the mama’s bench.’ Told my 14-year-old son the other day that ‘I love Kevin because he has restored mamas back to their rightful position in sports!’ Loved your insight.”

You know, Wanda Pratt is no small part of this story. Durant’s treatment of his mother most definitely hits home with mothers.

Kathy, who popped me pretty good originally, wrote back after I used part of her email in my column: “My goodness, but you don’t seem able to do proper research, either! Imagine my surprise to read that, according to you, the word ‘snot’ is ‘an old ’70s term.’ Which millennium? The word dates to the 1300s, Middle English or a little later, 1400s (Middle German, Dutch, Danish…..). And (sigh) I must object to the patronizing tone and tenor of your response to your female readers. We are not all ‘Aunt Bees!’ Are men’s viewpoints somehow more to your liking? And what does that say about your objectivity once again, hmmmm? Ah, but I fear we continue to beat that dead horse, now, do we not? No matter, I believe you are too set in your prejudices to bother with additional debate. In any case, I shall retire, and leave the field to you, so you may rave on as you please. Today you have proven my point. Do you even realize that you have?”

I don’t know what Kathy’s point was, but if my point was that Kathy was anything like Aunt Bee, I was mistaken. No one this insufferable ever stepped foot in Mayberry.

Of course, Kathy had company, even from men. Doug: “I do have to agree with Kathy. Like most people in the Oklahoma City area, we simply think your an idiot. I’m sorry but every time I read your column, or heaven forbid watch your one-minute clips, I want to rip my hair out. As do most people when they read or watch trash. And that’s exactly what you write.”

Here’s what’s beautiful about Doug’s email. I received it around 8 p.m. Friday. So the office put my column online Friday evening, several hours before it went to press, which has become standard. So some guy who claims to think I’m an idiot, but admits to even watching my videos, reads my column on a summer Friday night. Doug is not my enemy. My enemy is the people who don’t read me or The Oklahoman.

But back to a little more light-hearted fare. Don, a loyalist from Hooker, defended the use of “snot”: “In the Panhandle, it was also used to help explain how cold it was. ‘Slicker’n snot on a brass doorknob.’ Maybe a bit too graphic for some of your new lady friends. Keep up the good work.”

The use of the word snot really did make my point. I didn’t think twice about saying the Heat beat the snot out of the Thunder, and most fans didn’t, either, especially long-time sports fans. But the maternal-minded saw it differently.

Bart: “Many thanks for Saturday’s story on some of the differences in how sports in general and the Thunder in particular are processed by men vs. women. For multiple reasons, I found it to be insightful yet entertaining, without a hint of sexism. I know the high esteem with which you hold the women in your life. As a man who has four sisters, I appreciate that. You have my sympathy and respect for the volume and wacky extremes of responses you go through, including mine. Thanks again for providing something to look forward to on a daily basis. Hopefully, none of my correspondences will ever make your column!”

Well, sorry, Bart. All streaks must end.

Randy: “So, I’m a guy sitting here with fresh ground coffee and breakfast, laughing out loud at your article. Who knew? Wife of 42 years is much bigger fan of the boys than me, but I never heard her complain about your stuff. Anyway, really entertaining article. As always, you are the best. You big snot.”

Hey, watch your language.

James: “I liked your describing the Heat beating the snot out of OKC and didn’t think it was a crass observation.”

I didn’t think so, either, and truthfully, I wouldn’t have used it if I had.

Coleen: “You want me to go punch Kathy?”

Here’s what’s rich about Coleen’s email. I’ve been crossways with her. She was a big Jason White fan. Back in 2001, when I suggested Nate Hybl should win their first QB derby, Coleen wasn’t too smitten with me. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that she was right.

Another female reader, Carole: “I loved your ‘our boys’ column â€" it is SO TRUE! Exactly what I’ve been thinking and feeling. Russell, James, Kevin, Serge â€" those are my kids! I totally love them and think of them like they are MINE. Perk, Nick (my favorite in the player category; now HE’S a gladiator) and Derek (whom I liked for years and hope somehow will stay), those are the guys/men of the Thunder. And Thabo, well, Thabo…him I just lust after. Yesterday morning at work we were having our weekly team meeting and the guys were sitting there talking about trades to ‘enhance’ the Thunder. I was like ‘HOW can you guys talk like this? This is our family, they are each other’s family â€" they LOVE each other.’ It truly broke my heart. The guys were like ‘so?’ The Thunder won the Western Conference and went to the FINALS for goodness sake (I think that ‘goodness sake’ made me sound older than I am).”

In all seriousness, I don’t think I realized how right I was, in writing about the differences in male and female fans. Not everyone. But in general, I was spot-on.

Tom: “I needed some good humoring today to get my morning going and thanks to your ‘Our Boys’ column, I got that humoring. I, and I’m thinking you sportswriters, never thought about a bunch of women getting mad at you for writing tough critiques on the Thunder and the team. Interesting problem to have. Coach Brooks better not let these women hear him in the locker room after a loss. Or him and the other coaches when they review game film and every play of a game that a Thunder player messed up. I’m sure they don’t use ‘snot’ but rather another word that begins and ends with the same letters. At least you know women are now reading your paper.”

Interesting point. Scotty Brooks doesn’t do much railing on his troops. What if the Thunder had a yeller as coach? Might not go over too well.

Katy: “After reading your column, I have a few observations. As a woman who grew up with all brothers and then raised all boys, I have been a sports fan all of my life. I had my own subscription to Sport Illustrated as a single girl out of college and read every issue. Now, my kids are grown and moved out. I still read the sports page, watch Sports Center & PTI. That’s my background just so you might know from where I get my point of view. Most of my female friends (1) have no interest in sports, (2) have a casual interest in sports, often dictated by what the husband/boyfriend is following, or (3) have interest only in what their children are involved in. It is more than extremely rare to find a female who actually enjoys watching a college or pro football game just because it’s football. Even more rare to find a female who knows offsides from a false start. These rare qualities apply to basketball, baseball, golf, or just about any sport dominated by male participation. So, just like a woman, I’m finally getting to the point. My guess is that most of the motherly Thunder fans you are hearing from are new to NBA basketball. They are in it for the personal attachments to specific players. They probably have no interest in matchups nor recognize zone or man-to-man. They are not truly sports fans. They are personality fans. They do not read Sports Illustrated but would read an NBA version of People Magazine. And that percentage might surprise us both. And by the way, ‘snot’ does not offend me. I raised children and wiped countless noses. For those that were offended, I have heard countless hours of filthy language from mothers at soccer and little league, OU & OSU games, and OU/Texas games. ‘Snot’ would have been a welcome relief from their foul tirades.”

Let me clear the air a little. What Katy says is true, about new-to-the-game Thunder fans. But not all of them are women. There are some new Thunder male fans that are slow to figuring out this NBA stuff. The difference is, there’s not much maternal instincts there. The maternal side â€" the “our boys” phenomenon â€" is a female development.

Craig: “Women, you can’t live with them, you can’t live with them!”

Actually, I live in a female world. One daughter, no sons. Three granddaughters, no grandsons. It’s me and my son-in-law, outnumbered 5-2, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Carol: “What a fun article. You nailed it. Those are our boys. Most of us ‘Thunder Grans’ didn’t care anything about the NBA. In fact, we thought they were all a bunch of thugs until Chris Paul arrived in town. Now, we want to have them all over for Sunday dinner! You covered the subject very well. The only thing you forgot to mention is how much we would like to be represented at the exit interviews. You know, kind of like sending our boys off to summer camp. We need an opportunity to remind them to stay out of night clubs, read a good book, go to church, get lots of rest, and ignore those ‘groupie’ girls who, well, you know. So, can you use your influence with Coach Brooks so we can get in a few words of grandmotherly advice before our boys leave town next summer?”

Uh, Carol, the Thunder does have a decent group of guys. But your illusions will be shattered if you start telling these guys to stay out of clubs and stay away from girls.

Joe: “My mother is another one who has adopted the Thunder. At 79, she is the stereotypical little old lady. Prior to the Thunder, I’m not sure that she knew the NBA existed. Now, when I call my parents, Dad says that Joan has a direct line to Brooks. She is on the payroll of the team because she is an assistant coach. She immediately knows what needs fixing. She loves ‘her boys’ and never misses a televised game. Dad does NOT want Mom interested in the Texas Rangers.”

-------------Berry Tramel can be heard Monday through Friday from 4:40-5:20 p.m. on The Sports Animal radio network, including AM-640 and FM-98.1. You can e-mail him here and follow him on Twitter @BerryTramel. Visit Berry's website here.

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